I felt the familiar tightness in my chest as I listened to a friend describe their relationship challenges. The solution seemed clear to me - set boundaries, create distance and protect your heart a bit. When they finished sharing, I jumped in with my well-intentioned advice. 

Their response stopped me cold. "I have this under control. Please don't worry about it."

Ouch.

Later, processing this interaction with my husband, he gently offered a truth that I needed to hear - "Your expectations often leave you disappointed. Remember that you do not have a say over another person's decisions or life. Sometimes your 'helping' is really control in disguise."

Double Ouch.

This moment sparked some deeper reflection I needed to take about expectations - those invisible strings we attach to our "helpfulness". Whether in personal relationships or business spaces, these unspoken expectations often create the very distance we are trying to bridge.

Here's how I am making progress on resetting my expectations and evaluating before I jump in to "help":

1. Check the cost first. What expectations am I attaching to this - intentionally or not? Can I let go of the outcome?

2. Recognize that it is not about their response. Any disappointment I may feel is really about unchecked expectations - not their reaction.

3. How can I best honor their journey? Sometimes the most powerful help is simply holding space and listening.

The freedom from misguided expectations is releasing our grip on how others "should" respond to our help. In both personal relationships and business partnerships, true support often means letting others lead their own transformation.

What expectations could you release today?

Expectations are not just of others... we have expectations of ourselves too. 

Sometimes when we want to change or add something new to our lives - we need to let go of something else to create the space for the new or different. If you could use guidance in reflecting on expectations of yourself or what you want more (or less) of in your life, then check out our FREE "Do, Be, Let Go" guide here.

Or explore our Tools for LYFE™ for Self to see what resonates for your current needs. Click the images below to learn more about all of our offerings.